Computer ---Draft one
Computers are playing an important role in modern life. They have already been widely used in every aspect nowadays. First we use them to control the work of our electrical appliances. For example TV set, refrigerator, microwave, etc. In addition, all works of life need them. An engineer can use to design computer programs. A student does the assignment which need to hand in on line. An officer can use them to manage information so that they can save much time. Finally, the personal computer is common tool. Generalists usually go shopping, play on-line games, chats on the Internet to relax. If the world was without computers, it would be unimaginable.Personally, I have a liking for computers. As a result of the convenience offered by computers, I increase efficiency in the work and save much time. Besides, I use computer to send messages to faraway friends, and in this way, we make our distance become much shorter and shorter.
posted by 林小雞 @ 9:08 PM
6 Comments:
For example後面要有逗號
An engineer can use "it" to design computer programs.
or
An engineer can design computer programs "by using computer".
which "needs" to hand in on line.
the personal computer is "a" common tool.
Generalists usually go shopping, play on-line games, "chat" on the Internet to relax.
First ,we use them to control the work of our electrical appliances
I use computer to computer要冠詞
其他Penny挑完了
I have the same idea of 17 and 19.
I also think you can decrease your examples of all works of life need them, it seems a little long.
An officer can use them to manage information so that they can save much time.
前面是單數後面的they應該要是he或she吧
I increase efficiency in the work and save much time.
increase不確定可以用人當主詞
在查查看吧!!
Besides, I use computer to send messages
computer要加定冠詞
First,...
For example,...
is a common tool.
好多大家都挑完了。
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